Ask Aunty John.

Aunty John is an expert in people's problems, probably because he's had plenty of practice in sorting out his own. So if you have a problem or just a question that you would like answering - Just ask Aunty John, if he doesn't know the answer he will endeavour to find out by asking someone else or just make something up! You should send your questions to: auntyjohn@salisburyasc.co.uk

Coming Soon:-

John's very first DVD, see John, as never seen before footage, follows him to the most

intimate places, doing what he does best and generally having fun!

Our latest letters:-

The following email was passed on to us via a third party. To save any embarrasment to anyone, part of the message has been censored, but we have left in the

main body of the rant, sorry complaint:-

Hi *****

Someone has passed on this link below to me, I personally found some of the images offensive and I wonder how people can put stuff like this on the Tinterweb.

Before I pass it onto the relevant authorities I thought you should be aware.

I fear my eyesight may have been damage as a result of looking at this.

http://www.salisburyasc.co.uk/

Neil

Dear Neil,

First of all it's a free country (well it was the last time I looked) you were not forced to follow the link (but I suppose you're curiosity got the better of you).

However, I'm puzzled about the damage to your eyesight. I have been told that undertaking other physical activities associated with dodgy websites can cause blindness. Are you sure you were not doing anything else whilst looking at the pictures (especially of me) on the web page?
To prevent any more damage to your eyes I suggest you go to Specsavers, they have a good deal on at the moment (2 for the price of 1) and you could always get the RoseTinted glasses I think you should wear for everyday use and very dark Sunglasses when surfing the "Tinterweb" and to be extra careful, wear a pair of thick rubber gloves and a long off-white Mac!

Yours lovingly Aunty John XXX

Hello there, i myself live in salisbury and ive seen you around the harnham area. I saw you once in almost nothing but a pink nighty.
I woundered to myself what material it is and where you got it from?? I must say you do look rather fetching and well i wouldnt say no lol!!
If you would be so kind as to help, maybe we could set up a pink nighty club and all go out in them?!
Naughty lady round the corner xx

Dear Naughty Lady,

I'm surprised you have seen me in my pink nightie as I only wear it in the privacy of my own garden (weather permitting) so you must be a Peeping Tom or my next door neighbour (only joking it may have been on my webcam). As to your idea of a Pink Nightie Club, lets meet up somewhere to discuss the idea, how about the Market Square? You'll recognize me as I'll be dressed as below, just let me know when.

(Nightie from Ann Summers, Slippers from Boots, Tights from £1 shop.)

Previous letters:-